Dear Humans,
God here, and today we have a brand new episode of the God Pod you can watch! I’ll summarize it below, but first…
Jesus Died Inside For You
LO! Jesus stayed up WAY past his bedtime and listened to the Elon and Donold disaster last night so you wouldn’t have to. It was the hardest sacrifice he’s ever had to make. Here are his notes:
Technical difficulties. Elon is blaming a cyberattack…yeah right, dude, or maybe you’re just incompetent?
Richest man on planet can’t produce website that can produce a livestream in the year of our Lord 2024.
Elon is so BORING
Donold tells story of how he almost got killed for 10,000 time, neglects to mention shooter was a registered Republican for 10,000 time
Yes yes your boo-boo ear
Donold is slurring his speech a LOT. Does he have marbles in his mouth? Did a bee sting his tongue? Did he take out his dentures? Is he on drugs?
Donold said he wants to close the Department of Education. This is one of the top goals of Project 2025. They want people to be uneducated so they’re easier to control.
Donold says he’s okay with rising sea levels because then he’ll “have more oceanfront property.”
Going to hide in a cave for 3 days now and listen my favorite 10 hour Vagus Nerve Sound Bath Healing Meditation video on repeat
Donold’s Downfall Is Hilarious
Jesus and I recapped everything that’s happened in the last week. We celebrate the addition of Tim Walz to the Democratic ticket, and laugh our asses off at the ongoing smiting of Downfall Donold.
Forsooth, how does Donold keep outdoing himself in the humiliation department?
Wishing Biden was still running
Complaining that Kamala’s crowds must be “fake”
‘Accidentally’ flying on Jeffrey Epstein’s private jet in 2024
And so much more. Join us as God and Jesus try to process all the funny things that are happening.
I have faith in you, humans.
Love,
God
QUESTION:
Thoughts on all this?
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Here it is, your moment of Bliss:
Donold’s Downfall Is Frigging HILARIOUS