Elon’s Woman Sells Her Tesla
SMITE!
Dear Humans,
Lo, this one’s juicy. Elon’s 4th baby mama sold her Tesla and then publicly called him a petulant man-child. Grab some popcorn, this is gonna be fun.
1. His Woman Sold Her Tesla
Ashley St. Clair, right-wing influencer and 4th baby mama of one of Elon’s many offspring, says she had to sell her Tesla after he slashed her child support in February.
“I’m selling it because I need to make up for the 60% cut that Elon made to our son’s child-support.”
🔥 Watch Elon’s 4th baby mama sell her Tesla here:
2. She Exposes His Evil On His Own App
Elon tweeted, “I don’t know if the child is mine or not.”
LIES FROM THE PIT OF HELL!
Ashley replied right beneath it like a judgment from on high:
“America needs you to grow up, you petulant man-child.”
🔥 WITNESS THE SMITE!
3. His Time Is Running Out
This is who wants to run your country? A man who can’t manage his family?
It will never be enough. Not the tax breaks. Not the power. Not the worship.
His soul is a black hole that devours everything and still wants more.
But no one man will ever be able to oppress billions of people. Not forever.
Humanity will not allow it.
4. Join The Rebellion
In just three months, we’ve grown from 73,000 to 124,000 subscribers. That’s 51,000 new wonderful people who refuse to stay silent. Every day, more people are joining this rebellion.
"I love your content because it makes me laugh when the world feels like it's crumbling around me." - Kate
But here’s the thing—only a small percentage of readers actually support this work financially. If even a few more stepped up, we could expand our reach, expose more corruption, and push back harder against these fascist goons.
"We the people are pissed and God's words are what we need, and have always needed, in these dire times. We must stand together, or hang separately." - Dave
So if you’ve been waiting for a sign, this is it. This isn’t just a newsletter anymore. It’s a movement. And it’s growing fast.
Join God’s rebellion today:
Now go forth, spread the memes, and remember: laughter is holy, but fixing the system is divine.
Love,
God
Hang on, porn-named Ashley St. Clair, while I tune up my tiny violin. Your acting surprised that your baby daddy is a "petulant man-child" is viciously funny. We know you procreated with him for a) money, b) attention, and c) to propagate his hateful DNA, since you share his political opinions. So boo-hoo. Note to all homo sapiens possessing a uterus: DO NOT PROCREATE WITH THE PETULANT MAN CHILD, no matter how much he offers you.
“But no one man will ever be able to oppress billions of people. Not forever.”
I need to believe this but then I think of the people around the world oppressed by a so called President, who was elected by false voting results, like Russians. I don’t know if I have the time left to see our democratic republic restored.