God Announces Live Election Coverage

Dear Humans,

The LORD THY GOD shall host live election coverage starting at 7pm EST / 4PM PST on Tuesday, November 5.

I will be watching the results come in on CNN and MSNBC and offering my own reactions in real time. I may also flip over to Fox News sometimes to laugh at them as they freak out over their crushing defeat. I am feeling quite confident Donold is gonna get fucking destroyed.

Remember, as God, I’m never wrong. Plus, I’m going to be hilarious, I always am. It should be way more relaxing and funny than all the stuffy, boring options you have out there.

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