Jim Gaffigan Destroys Donald As Melania Watches
I’d like to report a murder.
Dearest Humans,
I should like to report a murder. Last night at the Al Smith Dinner, the comedian Jim Gaffigan spoke truth to power. I just watched it and he scorched them all to smithereens. Verily…holy shit.
Surrounded by corrupt billionaires, disgraced politicians, and other nefarious members of the 1%, Gaffigan did not hesitate. This comedian understood the assignment.
He had to go after everyone, and he did. But he saved his most savage lines for the end, for Donald and Melania. I’ll dive into his best lines in a minute, but first it’s worth noting…
KAMALA IS A SUPERSTAR
Kamala made the wise decision to not break bread with Donald Trump. So instead she sent in this video with Molly Shannon.
It’s brilliant.
SOME OF GOD’S FAVORITE GAFFIGAN JOKES:
So anyway, back to the savage takedowns.
“President Trump talked about migrants taking cats and eating them. So if you’re keeping track at home, this is the second time grabbing a kitty has been part of a campaign.” After a shocked, awkward response from the room, he said, “You know, I was going to leave that one out.”
The crowd gasped because he said this in front of Melania. GIVE ME A GODDAMN BREAK. Forsooth, I am so glad Jim didn’t leave it out.
“Jesus taught us to forgive seven times, not seven times, but 70 times seven. And Melania, you may be the first person to actually reach that.”
To be clear, Donald and Melania did NOT LIKE the jokes he was making. She was left scowling. GOOD! She deserves it…and so much more.
“It is impossible to not have a strong opinion about President Trump. You either think he is endearingly outspoken and brash, or you think he’s a sociopath, and you’d like to be his running mate.”
He slyly called him a sociopath…to his face.
“President Trump, I want you to know if you are re-elected, I always liked you. And I’m not saying that because I don’t want to be sent to a labor camp. Well, I guess that’s the reason, sir.”
This was Jim’s very last joke, and it was easily my favorite.
The LORD has actually had the good luck to see Jim Gaffigan perform live before. Well done, my good and faithful servant.
If thou missed it and wouldst like to see Gaffigan’s full torching of the establishment and Donald, here it is. Eat a gummy and BEHOLD:
THOU SHALT SPEAK TRUTH TO POWER!
THE LORD HAS SPOKEN!
Can I get an amen?
UPDATE:
Today I am losing support and paid subscribers because I watched Jim Gaffigan’s entire roast of Trump and felt that he destroyed him. For some, I guess it wasn’t overt or strong enough. I felt his satire was more subtle, but that’s what made some of his lines that more scathing. But yeah, it would’ve been better if he said ‘former president.’ Donald would have ran out crying.
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Dear God thanks for sharing. Jim kicked some FAT TRUMP nasty butt 😊🇺🇸💙
I watched the entire thing live. It was a disgrace that drumpf was allowed to speak hateful and foul language. I am not Catholic but felt so embarrassed especially when there were clergy and the Monsignor sitting there. I wish people had the fortitude to stand up and walk out and speak out loud that drumpf is not allowed to speak such hateful language. The Democrats sitting there were miserable and never laughed. There were some boos at the end. But the Monsignor was praying right after the evil drumpf spoke