Dearest Human,
Welcome back to Thunderdome. What began as a messy Christmas breakup between Elon Musk and MAGA has now escalated into an all-out MAGA civil war between the tech right and the groyper right. Settle in, grab some more popcorn and, after everything we’ve endured this year, just enjoy how wonderful it is to watch the worst people in the world destroy each other.
1. Elon Musk Goes Scorched Earth
Since yesterday, Elon Musk has continued to respond to MAGA’s outrage over his H1-B visa stance with righteous fury.
"Take a big step back and FUCK YOURSELF in the face. I will go to war on this issue the likes of which you cannot possibly comprehend." - Richest man on Earth reminds his peasants that he’s rich
From this we can surmise that Elon Musk sees himself as the Tom Cruise ‘Lex Grossman’ character from the 2008 film Tropic Thunder.
He went on to respond to the contemptible right-wing creator of ‘Dilbert’ Scott Adams by calling MAGA “contemptible fools.” Pot, meet kettle.
If that wasn’t enough, Musk shared a meme mocking MAGA factions, using a contemptible slur I will not repeat.
Eye-opening? Let’s hope so. Long term, it would be very good if someone with this much wealth and power were properly motivated to use it to fight this movement of extremely vile, xenophobic, racist bastards.
2. Trump’s Allies Attack Musk
Possibly as a sign that Trump is beginning to push back against Elon, some of his top allies went on the attack. Failed Attorney General nominee and rapist Matt Gaetz accused Musk of pandering to “tech bros” and failing to uphold MAGA’s anti-immigration gospel.
Recent inmate and decomposing corpse Steve Bannon called Musk a “toddler” and joked that Child Protective Services should intervene.
This isn’t just a slapfight on X—it’s the MAGA establishment vs. the man who once tried to become their hero.
3. MAGA’s Meltdown
Enjoy the schadenfreude! Lo, for they never thought the leopards would eat THEIR face.
Reading their pain, all I can say is…
4. What Happens Next?
This fight isn’t ending anytime soon. Personally, I hope they keep fighting forever. God will be right here laughing at them.
5. Join The Rebellion
Humanity is at a crossroads. Every network and billionaire seems to be bending the knee to Donold Trump and his fascist ambitions. The man literally wants to take over the world—and he’s coming for all of us who dare to oppose him.
We are risking everything to stand against him and his goons. Your support isn’t just helping us keep this radical leftist network alive—it’s a stand for truth, resistance, and survival.
So if you’ve enjoyed today’s righteous reckoning, or if you’ve been waiting for a sign, this is it. Upgrade your subscription today at 20% off before the sale ends tonight. Think of it as an investment in the forces of truth and satire.
Click here to claim your blessing and keep the smites coming.
Now go forth, spread the memes, and remember: laughter is holy, but fixing the system is divine.
Love,
God
PS - Make sure to follow God on Bluesky!
"Recent inmate and decomposing corpse Steve Bannon" jeez, just about spit out my coffee reading this description of Bannon. Good one, God! LOL!
Great letter, GOD! Very entertainingly written. I just became a paid subscriber so I could comment. I agree about hoping all the infighting continues, as long as possible! There’s a saying along these lines I keep thinking of, which I’m planning on attributing in a future Campfire Story on my blog to the spirit of Ivana Trump, looking up from above where she is nicely planted in an obscure corner of her once-husband’s golf course-cum-tax-write-off, in reference to the Women’s March and the many women who will be mobilizing against him amidst the chaos and infighting that is sure to continue, “Man Plans. God Laughs.”