Dear Humans,
Last night, President Joe Biden, in his farewell address, delivered a warning fit for stone tablets:
"Today, an oligarchy is taking shape in America... threatening our entire democracy, our basic rights and freedoms, and a fair shot for everyone to get ahead."
Translation: Billionaires are screwing us over, and they don’t plan to stop.
Eisenhower warned us of this in 1961, calling it the "military-industrial complex." Did we listen? Nay. We handed them blank checks.
Now, tech overlords like Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and Mark Zuckerberg have joined the party, turning social media into a propaganda machine for Donold Trump and his goons.
The question isn’t if they’re destroying democracy—it’s how fast.
1. Billionaire Shenanigans
Elon Musk: Transformed X into a sewer of bigotry and disinformation, amplifying conspiracies and attacking marginalized communities.
Jeff Bezos: Canceled a Washington Post endorsement of Kamala Harris and is producing a $40 million Melania Trump puff piece.
Mark Zuckerberg: Fired thousands of fact-checkers, legalized hate speech, and bent the knee to Trump faster than a knight swearing fealty to a tyrant.
They call this “free speech.” I call it BULLSHIT.
2. A Silver Lining? Verily, It Exists
Workers are fighting back: Amazon and Starbucks employees are unionizing.
Big Tech is under fire: Antitrust cases are gaining momentum and anger towards the oligarchy is growing.
Independent media thrives: Platforms like this one grow as people reject corporate lies.
These cracks are small, but they’re proof we can still resist.
3. What Can You Do?
Thou shalt smite the billionaires by:
Supporting independent media (like this one).
Demanding tech accountability—break them up, regulate them, tax them.
Organizing locally—change starts at home.
Staying vigilant—Biden said it best: “Now it’s your turn to stand guard. May you be the keeper of the flame.”
The billionaires want us to give up. But that’s not who we are.
I will never give up. NEVER!
THOU SHALT NOT LET THE BILLIONAIRE BASTARDS WIN, ME-DAMMIT!
4. Join The Rebellion
Thou shalt not let billionaires win. Donold Trump, a man who literally wants to take over the world, is coming for all of us who dare to oppose him. Every network and billionaire seems to be bending the knee to his fascist ambitions.
We’re risking everything to stand against him and his goons, bringing truth and laughter to the fight. Your support doesn’t just keep this radical leftist network alive—it’s a stand for resistance, survival, and the freedom to call out miserable pricks like him.
Some recent testimonials for God from humans:
"I hate the corporate controlled media. " - Barb
"It keeps me focused on the Progressive Future!" - Letitia
So if you’ve enjoyed today’s righteous reckoning, or if you’ve been waiting for a sign, this is it. Upgrade your subscription today at 20% off before the sale ends tonight. Think of it as an investment in the forces of truth and satire.
Click here to claim your blessing and keep the smites coming.
Now go forth, spread the memes, and remember: laughter is holy, but fixing the system is divine.
Love,
God
If billionaires were taxed justly, many of them wouldn't be billionaires! Until Citizens United is overturned, nothing will stop these greedy, power hungry bastards. Thank you, God! Amen! Awomen!
Agreed with Biden on all but one count here: 18 year terms is WAY too long, make it 10 at most. 2 5 year terms is MORE than enough to do some real work (if they even do that) and then you can fuck off to wherever you damn well please because you'll STILL have fat stacks of money.