Trump Humiliated By Failed Bombing

His claims have been 'obliterated' by his own government.

Dear Humans,

FORSOOTH, when Donold announced a mere hour after his strikes on Iran’s nuclear sites that they had ‘totally obliterated’ their targets, we all knew he was lying. It was impossible to know the actual success until they had some time to assess the attacks.

1. Give Him The Nobel Prize…for Stupidity!!!

Donold was wow’d by the big pretty explosion in his Situation Room TV screen and was in a rush to apply for a Nobel Peace Prize, so he told the world that it was Totally the Best Strike Everrr!!!

But the truth about the strike’s effectiveness came out quickly.

On Tuesday, an initial assessment by the United States found that not only were the targets NOT destroyed, but that Iran’s nuclear program would be up and running again in a matter of months from now. From the NYT:

“The strikes sealed off the entrances to two of the facilities but did not collapse their underground buildings, the officials said the early findings concluded.”

In other words, Iran lost a couple of doors. And they’ll be back in business in no time:

Before the attack, U.S. intelligence agencies had said that if Iran tried to rush to making a bomb, it would take about three months. After the U.S. bombing run and days of attacks by the Israeli Air Force, the report by the Defense Intelligence Agency estimated that the program had been delayed, but by less than six months.

Numerous reputable news outlets including CNN, The New York Times, and the Washington Post reported the government’s findings, and naturally, Trump’s brain went nuclear since his own government was undercutting his Super Awesome Explosion.

When asked by the media about the reports, Donold said at the NATO Summit on Wednesday:

“Inside, it’s all collapsed. Nobody can get in to see it because it’s all collapsed. And the tunnels are totally collapsed.”

So Donold, if no one can get in, how do you know just how bad (or not) the damage is?!?!

And so when he got back to his room and hopped on the toilet, stupid Donold continued to spiral:

Obviously no one is trying to criticize the work of the U.S. Military.

It was beyond idiotic of Donold to think these facilities could all be destroyed in ONE strike. Give him The Nobel Prize…for Stupidity!!

And this morning Donold deployed Pete Kegsbreath to attack anyone saying the Iran bombing wasn’t a success, but he provided zero proof it was. Just another day in these Fascist States of America.

2. A Message From God

They’re assaulting the mothers and fathers of US soldiers.

Roving gangs of masked men grab human beings off the street.

They send them without due process to prisons in countries they’re not even from where they are then sold into slavery.

As an American citizen, you are now at the whims of customs agents who want to arrest you for memes on your phone.

Make it stop.

Personally, I am in big trouble if they ever decide to look at MY phone! 😂 My saved memes are so fire, they would definitely send God to one of those foreign prisons.

Whatever happened to free speech? I thought this was America.

The reason we fight against fascism is because of love. Love for our friends and family.

Our children deserve better than this. They deserve not to live in a place where they must fear getting shot.

We love them. So we have to win.

And in time, we will. The axe forgets but the tree remembers.

As of this writing, a 33 year old Muslim Democratic Socialist is poised to become the next Mayor of New York City. The corrupt political establishment and the billionaires are furious. Donold is crying his eyes out over it. It’s amazing what can be accomplished when good folks work together.

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Love,

God