Thou Shalt Not Complain About Giving Children Free Lunches When You Are Forcing Them To Give Birth

They’re grasping at plastic straws again.

Tim Walz is, as Moses wouldst say, a complete and total mensch. He’s Ted Lasso meets Mr. Rogers—a teacher and a coach who can deliver jokes. Prime-time ready and frankly, slaying it at work, Tim is charming as all get out. And thus, the right-wing is freaking out. The Walz are closing in.

So what do they do? What they always do—make up things to get mad about.

Enter Megyn Kelly, a has-been TV host turned right-wing grifter, still clinging to relevance by stirring up baseless outrage. This is the same Megyn Kelly who hosted a Republican primary debate in 2015 where Donold said she had “blood coming out of her wherever,” and thereafter defended him with fervor unto this day. Behold, as she is utterly vaporized.

Of course, the claim Megyn Kelly made was also a lie. No one forced schools to put them in any specific place. But even if they were, who cares? Is someone going to perish because a tampon is available? Of course not.

The same people FURIOUS over tampons in school bathrooms don’t give a DAMN about stopping school shootings. They have not and will never lift a finger to stop your children from having to grow up in a place where they are not safe anywhere. Not at school, not at the mall, not at church. Nowhere.

Nope, their only solution for that is to give teachers guns. Oh, these weirdos also want teachers to inspect genitals before bathroom breaks to make sure every child is going to the right bathroom.

OH BUT CALL THEM NOT WEIRD!!! How dare we commit such an affront?!

MY HEART WILL NOT GO ON MUCH LONGER

Donold traveled to a rally in Montana today. As you can tell by the look on his face here, he is dead inside. He has that thousand-yard stare. He hath the look of a man who seeth his own demise. The grim specter of death looms. The reaper almost took him a few weeks ago. He’s living on borrowed time…and he knows it.

A few hours later, Demented Donold was back on stage, holding court with his cult. Even the paid actors behind him looked pretty bored.

Trump on Tim Walz: “He ordered tampons to be put into boys’ bathrooms. Do we have any children here? Please close your ears. He ordered tampons in boys’ bathrooms, OK?”

Of course, as always, if Donold’s lips are moving, he doth speak lies. No one ‘ordered’ anything. And did he tell everyone to ‘close’ their ears? It’s ‘cover’ your ears. And why should anyone have to cover their ears to know about tampons, Mr. “Grab’em by the Pussy”?!?

Trump on being called weird: We’re not weird.. we’re the opposite of weird… It’s terrible thing that they could do that.

“I know you are but what am I?” is the manner of fourth-grade intellectual discourse we’ve come to expect from these juveniles. In other news, JD Vance looks like Francis Buxton, Pee Wee’s nemesis.

“Today's my birthday and my father says I can have anything I want.”

Before Donold took the stage, they played the Titanic song “My Heart Will Go On,” by Celine Dion. It was a bit on the nose, even for Me.

It’s a fitting anthem for a sinking ship. If Donold were ever floating upon a piece of driftwood in the Atlantic, we all know he wouldn’t make room for Melania—she’d sink faster than Leonardo DiCaprio.

Meanwhile, Kamala Harris and Tim Walz art drawing vast crowds wherever they go. The multitudes grow ever larger and larger. Today in Arizona, they drew 20,000 souls.

Walz: You know, it's not as if anybody cares about crowd sizes or anything.

While Kamala and Tim gain even more momentum, the right-wing’s contrived outrage gets stupider with each passing day.

Let us not be swayed by their ridiculous claims. Instead, let us focus on what truly matters—creating a world wherein children are safe, educated, and free from the burdens of hypocrisy and lies.

Like Adolph in his bunker, the Walz are closing in on Donold. When he is gone, we can all finally be unburdened from that has-been.

“A deep man, believes that the evil eye can wither, that the heart's blessing can heal, and that love can overcome all odds.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Here it is, your moment of Zen:

Don’t forget to leave a comment with your thoughts on all this, so that our post can get engagement, because God also worries about ‘crowd size.’

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